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Are You Man Enough For A Bromance?

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As a by-product of continuing emasculation, the modern man has found himself yearning the company of men. Often for one man in particular. Welcome to the man crush.

In days gone by, men could do things. Things like fixing the car themselves and changing the oil, fishing, owning a shed full of tools and being able to build things from scratch with a few bits of scrap wood, a hammer and some nails. If we needed further proof that our lives have been emasculated we only need to look at the No More Nails product. Now it probably does get the job done just as well as nails, but it?s not manly unless you're banging nails in at the wrong angle with your hammer.

Modern man is a pale, disheveled shadow of his former self and it?s our distinct lack of a male compass that leads us into man crushes.

 

What is a man crush?

 

A man crush isn?t technically a crush in the traditional sexual sense of the word. It?s more like looking to men with certain skills and talents as our leaders. To teach us their ways. Whether it?s the guy with the well paid job, the man who always gets the girls or even the guy with a cool sense of fashion and style.

Often you?ll find yourself making excuses to your girlfriend in a desperate attempt to spend another Saturday night with him rather than her. It boils down to projecting who you can?t be ? or things you can?t do ? onto other men.

Take The Fonz from Happy Days for example. Richie, Potsie and Ralph all looked up to him. Three total geeks seeking guidance. They wanted to be The Fonz. Let?s face it, who didn?t? He rode motorbikes, was a tough guy and got all the ladies. The fact that he was an unemployed mechanic who lived in a garage and spent most of his time hanging out with teenage boys is irrelevant. The primeval urge to bond with and look up to men manifests itself in their complete devotion to this alpha male.

It?s a simple fact that when not trying to get into some hot girls pants, men will always prefer to hang around with other men.

 

Do I have a man crush?

 

Now there are probably men reading this who think that, although they know other men that they like and enjoy spending time with, the terms ?bromance? and ?man crush? are a little bit of an over-exaggeration. Well, picture this scenario:

You?ve just been asked out on a date by a gorgeous blonde woman when you bump into George Clooney. George invites you to a poker game at his house. The Oceans 11/12/13 guys will be there and no women are allowed. Which would you choose?

It?s an absolute no-brainer. Welcome to the world of man-crushes my emasculated friend.

If you?ve got a man crush on someone, famous or otherwise, and aren?t afraid to admit it then drop us a comment and let us know why you admire this person so.

Learn to turn this off. I

Learn to turn this off. I don't give a crap about George Clooney. He is an actor not a man who can do manly things. He probably doesn't even know how to weld. Most celebrities are overpaid losers with a drug problem. Henry Winkler is also an actor.

The first step is to stop acting like a teenage groupie and learn to do something (WORTHWHILE) by yourself that you haven't done before. Stuff like playing video games doesn't count.

The second step is to not give a crap what others think and do what you want. Let your hair grow out, go full beard, frameless glasses. Screw the fashion police.

Build a spaceship in your front yard for kids to play on...

[...] Are You Man Enough For

[...] Are You Man Enough For A Bromance? [...]

This is a horrible post.

This is a horrible post. Dude, I love your blog, but come on.. man crush? It's like saying that I am sexually aroused by my friends. I understand that your definition of man crush is not sexual, but then what is the difference between man crush and friendship?

I look up to my friends in some ways and they look up to me in other ways. But would I ever ditch a girl for my friends? I think the question is better rephrased as "would my friends let me ditch them for a girl". If they are my friends, then if I didn't go with the chick I would forever be the guy who has a man crush on my friends. That is not a title I want to have.

"It?s an absolute no-brainer.

"It?s an absolute no-brainer. Welcome to the world of man-crushes my emasculated friend."

Holy crap. I know no one that would rather play poker with a bunch of nut-less Hollywood posers than go out with a tasty blonde.

I stumbled into this website. If this is a site for those that would rather be seen with a bunch of Hollywood metrosexuals, then I ain't a gonna be back.

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Man. How can you guys be

Man. How can you guys be complaining about an emasculated male society when you are running a contest featuring metrosexual facial care products.

[...] Just A Guys Thing asked

[...] Just A Guys Thing asked if you’re Man enough for a Bromance. [...]

Sorry bro, I'd go for the

Sorry bro, I'd go for the blond. But I'm a sucker for blonds. Lol.

"He probably doesn't even

"He probably doesn't even know how to weld"? Are you serious? He probably doesn't compete in world's strongest man competitions either, so he's clearly not a man. I bet you weld heavy things together and then lift them to prepare for the WSM, then drive your hummer to a brothel.

I don't even care about george clooney either, he's clearly just an example here, substitute your own hero in and read it again. But since when does one need to be employed in a trade like welding to be manly ? Let's bite on the george clooney bait some more here, as you were avid to do:

His foundation has given over 9 million dollars to human rights... but you don't think he can weld so he's clearly not a man. I guess it's not as manly as pulling a wounded child out of a burning car teetering on the edge of the grand canyon every day though, like a real man does.

Here's a quote from an article about him, at least he's manly enough to know how to use a screwdriver? can you give him that at least? minor woodworking or carpentry skills are no welding, i admit. article at: http://www.time.com/time/arts/article/0,8599,1714996-1,00.html

"It's past midnight; we're both pretty buzzed. He's telling me how he wakes up every morning at 5:30 to the hoots of a giant owl and how he climbs into his hot tub so he can hoot back, mesmerized by nature, like Tony Soprano and his ducks, when this alarm starts shrieking. Clooney, not a man of inaction, especially in a moment of crisis like this, stands on my dining-room table, unscrews a panel in the ceiling and, finding nothing, makes me go outside and carry a huge ladder with him up two flights to my garage upstairs?where he climbs into an area I've never dared go, crawling along the beams with a screwdriver between his teeth. Finding nothing, he climbs down, knocks the dirt off his jeans, blows the dust out of his nose, rinses his hands and returns to the table. The shriek starts again, and Clooney thinks for a few seconds, ducks down and yanks the carbon monoxide detector out of the outlet. "Either it needs a battery," he says, "or we have six seconds to live."

Bromance is a great word though.

Every relationship has a

Every relationship has a sexual component. Guys might not admit to the possibility of a bromance or man-crush but what about its opposite? Have you ever been repelled or disgusted by another guy? I?m sure this is a common scenario yet it has certain similarities to the man-crush. After all why should another guy make your flesh crawl like an ugly old woman might? It?s because that guy has absolutely no sex appeal and your primitive sub-conscious mind is absolutely aware of that and telling you to run away.

This maybe a mechanism that sorts you into a group. The man yearns to be in the alpha group and so will choose the Clooney poker night over one night with the blonde because it will be a better investment for the future. The Clooney group would undoubtedly offer better future opportunities to see more blondes. Women are the same, joining groups of females that rate similarly in the beauty and style department. Have you ever seen a group of young ladies and noticed how similar they all look?

I reckon too when that blonde finds out that you gave up a night with Clooney to be with her, she?s going to think sub-consciously, ?desperate loser?.

What is missing here is the

What is missing here is the understanding of knowing who and what you are.

There is no doubt that we do have man crushes to our closest bud- or best friend. The fact is most men are such wimps that they get afraid of being gay or thought of as gay. And it has nothing to do with that. When we're that close to another guy, we will want to hang more with him. It is human nature to be in an environment that is going to feed you the energy you really are looking for, whether you say it out loud or not.

It's the same with animals. You will see them in herds by gender, because ultimately they're learning from each other and feeding off the energy they receive. A man crush is heightened by the awareness that this energy in itself is reciprocating what you're giving and without speaking a word. Not to mention having a lot in common and admiration and respect for the other guy. You put all of this together and yes, you absolutely have a man crush.

The very point that some of you are defending your position of manhood, speaks volumes. This has nothing to do with that and it actually would take a real man to be able to admit it and know themselves enough for it to be okay. Perhaps even in your childhood you " experimented ". Even that was acceptable and a normal part of becoming who you are. Did it make you gay? Or less of a man? Of course not. It's just the way it happens. It really had nothing to do with sex. You were discovering who you are and bonding.

To diminish your feelings towards another human being because they happen to have the same equipment you have is just plain dumb. And a huge lost. For the record, all of you are lying if you say you would not hang out with George Clooney playing poker with the other Ocean Brothers over a blond and is crap....Let's be real...You'd be begging your girl or wife to let you go and you know it!

It's true, unless you're so

It's true, unless you're so desperate for women that you are missing the one chance for a roll in the hay, in which case it's the blonde. Clooney, or any other hollywood guy wouldn't matter. But make it your older brother, or maybe the coolest guy you ever actually knew, and my guess is that the girl can wait. If she's worth it, she will, and if you don't think she will, I sure hope you don't ever consider marrying her.

"To diminish your feelings

"To diminish your feelings towards another human being because they happen to have the same equipment you have is just plain dumb."

That is such a true and valid statement. Seriously, why can one man not love another male friend in a brotherly way (or love a celebrity). This has absolutely nothing to do with sexuality. If one was homosexual, then the guy would hit on another guy because he is sexually attracted to him. On the other hand, a heterosexual guy would love to spend time with another guy (say, a really good friend) as much as possible. He probably thinks about this alpha male a lot, looks up to him and respects him with great admiration. Simply, the guy loves him; he is not in love with him; there is a huge difference.

I admit, I have a mancrush on one celebrity and one really close friend of mine. I really look up to this friend; it is a fraternal love. I could easily say "I love you" to him to his face in front of people...simply because I do. I have so much respect, admiration, and strong emotions for this friend (probably so much that I want to be him, because I want to be him). When we're far apart from each other, I miss him so much. Now, this has absolutely nothing to do with homosexuality. This is greater than a strong friendship. Can you compassionately hug a guy friend, tell him you love him, and not have any sexual feelings for him? THAT is what a mancrush is. And only a real man can admit to such.

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I'm female and I think the

I'm female and I think the reason I like it when guys have bromances and a "bros before hos" mentality is because it's so rare that men will admit they care for another guy without simultaneously making a big machismo show of their heterosexuality.

So it's just refreshing when a guy is man enough to unabashedly admit that he loves his best friend (I'm not talking sexually, though I wouldn't see anything wrong with that either). It's a strong quality because it means he's confident with his feelings, loyal, capable of emotional attachment, and immune from what others might say about him. Those are appealing attributes to me.

Also, since ours is a culture where women are constantly encouraged to have emotionally fulfilling relationships of all kinds (with their children, friends, lovers) it's important to remember that deep relationships are important for men, too, not just women. Again, I don't necessarily mean sexual love, because platonic love also enriches our lives.

I adore my best friend and she's as important to me as my spouse would be if I had one. She enhances my life in so many ways. Male friends enhance each others' lives too and there's absolutely nothing wrong with that.

"whats the difference between

"whats the difference between friendship and bromance?"

I thought he had a convincing argument but as I read along I realize that the author of the original article was making a case for men having affection for men which he terms, "bromance". Friendships could on the other hand cover a girl and a boy, vice versa; a man and woman or whatever other combinations relationship but bromance is just for the guys. I think the bigger issue that is being subtle address is, the extreme difficulty that men have in showing their affection for another man, even though deep down inside of them sits the unbridled love they have for their friends that are men.
I had a hard time telling another guy that I love him, it actually became harder to do the more I did it. When I realize it took courage to tell another guy that I love him, the heh hem, man inside of me was challenge not to be a whimp. If you want a most interesting study genuinely tell guys who you love that you do love them and take note of the responses. You would be amazed how many different responses you would get to such a simple declaration. Again, Of course these are people that you genuinely love that you are telling this to; you don't want to cheapened love! Some of the responses I get is, "we love you too". Which makes me think who is the "we"-sometimes its the wife-and then I would think I hardly know your wife. Other times there are just dead silence, some of my friends after they take a deep mancheck, so to speak says, "I love you too man". In my head, I am asking why is it so hard to tell another guy you love him if you actually do? It is this question and the answer that has gotten me to research bromance and the very much lack of it in our society. I wonder if its because men are not allowed to express their love to each other why in some cases their love turns sexual? Just a question I don't know.
WALC, TN

Whatever you wanna call it,

Whatever you wanna call it, this is a real thing. I'm gay, and there's a very big difference between the way I feel about my boyfriend and my male friends. I do all the, break-out-the-tools and get-sweaty stuff with them he's not interested in. We've bonded over teaching each other how to build or fix something, a new personal best in the gym, etc., and helped each other through heavy-duty emotional stuff too, but it's not like anybody's waiting for the cheesy porn music to start. You can be attracted to anybody as a person without expecting (or even wanting) to hit the sheets.

Heck yea I have a man crush,

Heck yea I have a man crush, I'm married with kids who have kids. I'm straight, and now at this point in life I have a 'best friend' you know like when you were a kid. I hang on this guy's everyword, I totally respect him and don't want to disappoint him. I seek his advice, and we give each other 100% honest 2 way communication. I've never grown so much as a person since I became friends with this man. Who is it you ask? He is my pastor at church, and I am thrilled to know him beyond just a minister / parrishoner relationship. Yes he is handsome, but he is also very, very wise.

the word bromance is sooo

the word bromance is sooo fu*king gaaayyy!!! I'm sorry but if you say you have a bromance with your male friend you are gay. stop living in denial. and please dont ever say this in front of a woman because it will make you look like a total homo.

I love this post cause i love

I love this post cause i love seeing guys freak out over anything remotely gay.

To be honest...I think the manlier guys and hotter guys are the guys in "bromances." I have dated guys who will drop their friends for me at a moments notice and complain behind my back like "sorry, if i don't she'll get mad" and its actually pretty emasculating and a turn-off when a guy is so desperate for poon or a girlfriend to validate him that he lets you basically whip him around and tell him what to do.

I'm more attracted to guys who are challenges. They aren't as desperate. Wimpy. And platonic male bonding is kind of a turn on. Walking into a room full of testosterone....:-D It can be intoxicating.

Most atheletes that I've dated have been in bromances. They are the alpha male types. So masculine that they don't care if someone sees them as "gay" because they do a sport, they're buff and good with the ladies.

I'm getting off topic. But men who are so insecure and nutless that the very mention of a word like bromance makes them stop scratching their nuts and spitting in public are wimps. The same kind of guys who would put on panties and a stockings if their girlfriend threw a hissy fit and told them they had to.

[...] a year ago, JAGT

[...] a year ago, JAGT spotted a new trend among guys: the “bromance“. Also known as a guy crush, here’s our definition of a bromance from that original [...]

I am in two bromantic

I am in two bromantic relationships, one with my brother-in-law and one with a friend. We are all heterosexual and married to women. The feeling of love I have, which in each case is shared in return, is a beautiful thing. Further, we are not afraid of intimacy, sharing hugs, kisses on the lips, and "I love you's" whenever we have the chance. None of our wives feels threatened, knowing that there is absolutely no sexual meaning behind our relationships.
I am glad that men finally feel comfortable sharing openly a love for each that women have been enjoying with other women for years.

Hal, that's great to hear.

Hal, that's great to hear. If more men could be a bit more open with their emotions and sharing a bond with other men, I think we'd all be better off. The stereotype of guys just hanging out in front of the TV grunting is, while not completely inaccurate, certainly out of date.

i openly admit that i like

i openly admit that i like men! in fact i am so sick that i can like men who look though they havent washed them in weeks! as long as they possess good looks and bodies!!! as far as washed up, clean, good looking men are concerned they do not possess the same sexual vibe as the dirty men do but they have a different sort of a vibe the clean sexual vibe!!!! i would love to kiss guys or men with kissable lips!!!

I'd take the chance to hang

I'd take the chance to hang with Clooney any day, but not because I've got any "man crush" on him. Unless having a profound respect for someone's success is defined as such.

Why would anyone choose some random babe when they had a chance to hang with some of the most respected actors of our time?

The issue I've got isn't really even with that question, but with the way "bromance" is defined. It's ridiculous to add that sort of connotation to men spending time with each other for the sake of just being men.

Now, if you chose spending a night with your friends talking about how you're not certain of your sexuality, rather than spending that same evening with your girl/looking for girls/not doing anything at all, I'd be inclined to agree with the term "Bromance."

When I was 25 I met a

When I was 25 I met a straight classmate aged 32, married with two children, extremely masculine. He woulkd always keep a seat for me next to him when I was to arrive late, and he would treat me like a son or a little brother. One day he said he had an adoration for me. I was like heaven. Unfortunately he went back to Rio de Janeiro - I live in Bahia state. Looking back at those sweet days I realize that I was into a bromance. I believe that this can happen to any kind of man, no matter how tough they are. By the way, I conside myself as a bi-sexual.

I have a room mate and look

I have a room mate and look up top him alot. We care for each other well beinig.. Same interest in foods and life and enjoys to try new things. I wish we were brothers...

Since you don't want that

Since you don't want that tasty blonde, can I have her? Name and phone number, please.

George who?

The bromance or the man crush

The bromance or the man crush is not a product of the modern emasculated world.It exists since the begining of the world.
Have you ever read some of the ancient myths?Let's remember
Gilgamesh and Enkidu,the biblical story about king David and
Jonatan,most of the ancient greek myths,there were many such stories
in Egypt,Japan....The deep friendship between men and the brotherhood
rituals were kept sacred by the vikings and the slavic pagan
people.The blood brotherhood ritual was ushered into presence
of the nordic faith.The slavic faith had "bratchnitca"-if someone
loved another person deeply,he could accept it as his brother.
This made the families bigger and stronger.

It is very true,that the alfa males are more apt to bromances.
This can be seen in the army or among the military people at all.
I have seen too,that most athletes are into such relationship.

It is the same case with the freemasonry brotherhood(where women are
not accepted-traditionary).Such deep connections between people(men)
in one group could be a source of power(and the freemasons are
really very powerful group of people).

The deep friendship between the famous german poet and writer J.W.von
Goethe and Schiller became a source of great inspiration and both
have left many great artworks.

So,this is the basis one man to seek deep relationship with another
man-to increase his own personal power.So do many feminized women.
The man crush has very deep,complicated spiritual nature.Metaphysical
too.And it is again and again connected with the strive to increase
the personal power-something,that is typical for the man.That's why
it is not well accepted by the society.The strong people are not
accepted and beloved.Look what is the attitude towards the freemasons
for example.Or the occultists(those who are succesful).The others,
who appear to have lesser power(no matter what nature it has-social,
finnancial,occult,spiritual...)will cry that this is homosexual,
twisted and immoral..while they will complain over and over again
that they feel not sure,not safe.

Women have the rightr idea.

Women have the rightr idea. They are always making deep connections with each other and enjoying the great benefits that come from such close relatinships. They do this with no fear of being viewed as gay and their reward is true friendship.

Regarding men, I really believe that there is a natural tendency (and need) for every guy to establish a deep connection with another guy (or guys).

I had a few healthy "bromances" as a young guy. My closest friends were real buddies. We spent most of our waking hours together (movies, sports & time at the gym, drinking). We weren't afraid to show affection (arms around each other, guy-hug, sometimes roughhousing and wrestling). And we actually talked openly with each other. I think these close brotherly bonds with each other has made all of us the caring and loving husbands and fathers that we are today. I really cherish those friendships.

Unfortunately, as we get older we tend to shy away from such relationships for fear of being percieved as gay and as a result we are starving our souls.

To me, a bromance is a healthy friendship. Men and boys should seek these friendships. The rewards are priceless.

I think all men know the

I think all men know the difference between "bromance" and "gay".

That's because all heterosexual men have had and have experienced "bromance" at certain points in their lives. It's part and parcel of being a man.

stef Says: December 19th,

stef Says:
December 19th, 2008 at 4:16 am
the word bromance is sooo fu*king gaaayyy!!! I?m sorry but if you say you have a bromance with your male friend you are gay. stop living in denial. and please dont ever say this in front of a woman because it will make you look like a total homo.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Congratulations, Stef. You have won the most uneducated award.

I always feel so GLAD I'm

I always feel so GLAD I'm female because I can be freer and safer and just more spontaneous. If I were male I'd feel afraid all the time: getting beaten up, punched, hijacked, killed - and then there would be the pressures: to succeed, to conform, getting conscripted, not showing sadness or fear....(oh the tyranny!).

As a female, and a shy nervous one, I don't have to think twice about demonstrating affection or admiration whatever someone's gender - even if I were gay nobody would probably be any the wiser (not that I'd care anyway!). So the likelihood of getting beaten up or even particularly pilloried just because somebody thought I might be gay is highly remote. If I were male I'd be pretty damn jealous of the female sex.

So any blokes who are brave enough to run this gamut and openly show their affection and admiration of other blokes have ALL my sympathy and admiration - and I can't blame them if they feel they can't risk doing this. I don't think, in their place, I could.

Some commentors here question

Some commentors here question the term "bromance" asking why we can't simply call close male friendships "friendships." Why attach the word "romance?"

That's a valid question, but for me the answer is obvious.

A bromance has some of the same energy as a romance. It's not sexual, but it's similar to the high you get in a romantic relationship. You know, how great you feel when you're infatuated with someone or have fallen in love? A bromance has that same kind of exhilaration but it's not sexual and probably not quite as powerful.

A friendship isn't necessarily as uplifting. You can be friends with anyone--co-workers, guys on a sports team, people you hang out with once in a while.

A bromance is a desire to be together often, to share thoughts and feelings not shared with others, to be excited about doing something special with the person (going on a trip, planning a fun weekend), and missing the guy when he's away.

Those elements are similar to a romantic relationship so the term "bromance" is quite appropriate.

Your all gay

Your all gay

 
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