Holy S*#t: The Most Sweartastic Movies Ever Made

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If you like movies jam-packed with f-words and expletives, you’ll want to check out the most foul-mouthed films in movie history. It’s sweartastic.

It’s no secret that we love movies here at Just A Guy Thing. We like horror movies, generic guy films and guy flicks we haven’t seen before. However, we’ve never actually chosen a movie based solely on the level of profanity it contains. For a start, how would we know which movies were the most effin’ foul-mouthed? Well, those wonderful folks over at Kids In Mind have done just that, and a whole lot more too.

The site seeks to advise adults about a movies suitability for children, and it’s pretty damn comprehensive. What we love about Kids In Mind is that they pass no judgment on the nudity, profanity and violence that each reviewer bears witness to. Each category achieves a mark of out 10 and it covers everything from Dunstan Checks In (“Sexual innuendo; a towel-clad woman moans pleasurably while being massaged.”) to the one movie that scored a perfect 10 in each category, 70’s slasher, Halloween.

The level of detail is fantastic. Take Team America: World Police – “62 F-words and its derivatives, 12 sexual references, 9 scatological terms, 59 anatomical terms, 14 mild obscenities, 14 derogatory terms for homosexuals (some are in an ongoing play on words referring to the Film Actors Guild as F.A.G.), 1 derogatory term for African-Americans, 6 religious profanities, 15 religious exclamations (1 in French with no translation).” Somebody had to take the time to count and compile these facts. That’s comprehensive.

Only two movies had a level of swear words so high that the reviewers literally couldn’t count them all – comedy Fear Of A Black Hat (“F-words galore and other profanities, from the opening credits to the end, nonstop”) and the bare-breasted Madonna flick Dangerous Game (“Counting the F-words will force the viewer to miss the film. There is also a full range of scatological and anatomical terms”).

Here are a selection of the most foul-mouthed films in movie history (minus the two that couldn’t be counted).

Summer Of Sam

This New York serial-killer flick from Spike Lee is a furious foul-mouthed frenzy of expletives with a tally of “about 400 f-words” and a few homosexual and racial insults.

Alpha Dog

Ignoring the fact that the geek from The Girl Next Door got cast as a drugs dealer, Alpha Dog contains “310 f-words and it’s derivatives”. Pretty fu*king impressive, considering the movie was a total let down.

Running Scared

Guns, corrupt cops and a bag full of 267 f-words sounds like a recipe for success. That is, until you cast Paul Walker as the lead actor. There were also 4 derogatory terms for homosexuals – all of which were directed at Paul Walker by the cast and crew on the set.

Pulp Fiction

Pulp Fiction very nearly reached a perfect 10 across all categories, narrowly missing out in the sex stakes. (Although that gay rape scene would have pushed it to a 10 if we were reviewing it!) The swear count weighs in at about 250 f-words but they don’t specify whether it includes Samuel L Jackson’s wallet…

State Property 2

Never seen it? Us neither. But it does boast an impressive 248 of our four-lettered friends and you can’t really argue with mobsters, can you?

The Big Lebowski

After brazenly missing this movie off our 100 Movies Every Guy Must See list, we’re happy to finally include the Coen brothers cult classic. About 240 f-words in this flick, most of them booming from the vocal chords of John Goodman’s character, Walter. (“Shut the fu*k up, Donny!”)

Jay And Silent Bob Strike Back

Although 228 f-words is pretty good going, if Silent Bob had pulled his effin’ weight, this lewd parody from the mind of Kevin Smith would have managed a whole lot more profanity. Shame, really.

The Departed

Chalk up 226 f-words and its derivatives for the legendary Martin Scorcese. He also makes sure that ‘acoustically-impaired’ viewers don’t miss out by including six obscene hand gestures. What a gentleman.

Do you have a sweartastic movie favorite that isn’t listed here? Drop your recommendation in the comments, you fu*king *&#$.

Just A Guy Thing is a men's lifestyle magazine focused primarily at guys wanting to better themselves.

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