User login

Buyer Beware: R. Kelly Wants To Take You On A Cruise

In a move that will have his entire PR team shitting bricks until the boat returns to port with everyone intact and accounted for, R. Kelly has decided to throw a big ole' cruise for his fans. I mean, nothing untoward could ever take place with R. Kelly, a thousand of his biggest fans, and 500 bedrooms, could it?

680 cruiseShip-text_jpg_627x325_crop_upscale_q85.jpg

The cruise ain't cheap, with double occupancy rooms for the five-day cruise starting at $1,500. However, if you're really into black women that probably LOVE to have sex, then this cruise could very well be your Woodstock. I mean, this is a guy that they love even after a video surfaced of him pissing on a 14 year-old girl. Just think about the stuff they'll be down for. It would be most anything!

Of course, I'm just highlighting the best possible scenario. Worst scenario: you're dumb enough to bring your girlfriend to this cruise, R. Kelly has sex with her, then her body is found floating in the Carribean a few days later. Eh, maybe it would be worse if she disappeared for two hours, you both arrive home safely, and you had to spend the rest of your life wondering if your girlfriend/wife had sex with R. Kelly. 

So, if you want to roll the dice, book your weird, weird trip right here

 
Air New Zealand Introduces 'Cuddle Class'
I think Air New Zealand wants us to start having sex on their planes. That's my big takeaway from their "cuddle cla...
 
The Oslo Bombing Suspect Will Go to the Cushiest Prison Ever
A few brief days after the Oslo bomb exploded, killing 76, suspect Anders Behring Breivik is in jail, having confes...
 
Amsterdam Craze: Smart Car Tipping
If you've ever been to a rural area you've probably heard of cow tipping. Now the latest craze in Amsterdam i...
 
Four “Cultural” Events To Hit In 2012
by Jess Linn Don’t worry. They aren’t actually that cultural. And I promise that Burning Man isn’t on the li...
 
The Best Las Vegas Hotels for Bachelor Parties
Bachelors and Vegas go together like strippers and the poles they dance on. In Sin City, it?s almost too easy t...