The Top 5 Things Jerks Do To Get Women
If nice guys finish last, then it's time you started winning some races for a change! Here are some vital tips on how the Jerks get women.
This is a guest post by Joseph Matthews from Art Of Approaching
It's the age old question every "nice guy" ends up asking himself at one time or another...
"I'm a good guy, so why is it all the jerks get the women and I'm stuck being alone?"
Sometimes, it's easy to believe that Jerks have some type of magical power that allows them to sucker women into liking them and somehow have them hang around while they treat them like dirt.
This happens SO MUCH, that some guys believe that they actually have to BECOME Jerks to get women attracted to them.
But make no mistake about it - nobody likes a jerk. Not even the women who date them! So if that's the case, why is it obvious that they get so many girls to go for them?
Well, remember that Jerks tend to go through lots of women quickly. Most girls will only put up with Jerk behavior for so long before they get sick of it. And those who stick around have such low self esteem as it is, that they've formed some type of strange attachment to the emotional abuse Jerks doll out.
That said, there are a number of things Jerks do to attract women that make them effective seducers and pick up artists. And these are things that "nice guys" can do, and get the same results.
Here are the top 5 things Jerks do to get women, and how you can do them too - WITHOUT having to become a prick...
- Jerks are self-centered
- Jerks aren't afraid to approach women
- Jerks don't censor themselves
- Jerks are honest about what they want.
- Jerks safeguard their self esteem
One of the big things a Jerk has going for him is that he really doesn't care about other people. In fact, his focus is almost entirely on his own pleasures, thoughts, and feelings.
Because of this, when he sees something he wants, he goes after it!
When your average "nice guy" sees a hot girl, he might be intimidated. He wants her to like him. He wants approval from her. In short - he cares about what she thinks!
But in addition to that, most guys care about what other's think too! They worry about a girl rejecting them in front of other people, and what those people will think when they see it happen.
Jerks do not have this problem. They couldn't care less about what other people are thinking. The Jerk is only focused on getting what he wants.
When you allow yourself to focus on your goals, and set aside fears of judgment from others, this gives you a great deal of focus, and as we all know, focus is KEY to achieving what we desire.
The single, most important step in getting a woman is walking up to her and talking to her.
So many guys just DON'T DO THIS. They are too shy, or too intimidated by the girl to do so. Instead, they hang back and just stare at her like a big dummy, wishing he could find the balls to meet her.
Jerks don't hesitate to approach a girl. They're not worried about whether or not she's going to like them, because THEY DON'T CARE.
They're thinking about how hot it's going to be to make out with her. They're thinking about how much fun it will be to get her in bed. The LAST thing on their mind is "fear of rejection."
To a Jerk, if a girl rejects him, there's something wrong with HER, not him. Nice guys will say "Oh, I'm too ugly, she doesn't like me." Jerks will say "That bitch is a total lesbian."
Just the act of being able to approach a girl and start talking to her puts the Jerk at an advantage, because he's interacting with the girl, and the "nice guy" isn't. To the girl, the nice guy doesn't exist!
That's why women typically have such low opinions of men, because it's always the Jerks who are approaching the women while the shy guys sit off in the corner!
Jerks realize it's not the woman's job to approach the guy. If you want something, you have to go after it.
So if the Nice Guys were to start walking up and talking to women, they might be surprised to find most women WELCOME their company and really want to meet a good fella to treat them right!
Part of the reason Jerks come off as fun, interesting, or exciting is because they aren't worried about offending anybody. They will talk about whatever, joke about whatever, and even broach "sensitive" topics of conversation without a blink of an eye.
Too many "nice guys" hold back when they talk to a girl they like. They NEVER bring up sex. They don't even joke about it. Heck, they don't even display any sign they even LIKE the girl.
Because of this, the Nice Guys become the Boring Guys.
The Jerk will come along, make an off-color joke, tell the girl a racy story, and even MAKE FUN of the girl!
He could care less if he offends somebody. To the Jerk, he's just doing what comes naturally to him. Attitude like this is like a breath of fresh air to many women, because they mistake it as "confidence."
But the more they are around the Jerk, the more they realize it isn't confidence at all - its just narcissism, and a complete lack of caring about others.
A nice guy would do well to "loosen up" when first meeting a girl and not try and please her so much, just like the Jerk does. But in the long term, it's okay to care about what a girl thinks and be on your best behavior. But do this ONLY after you've created an attraction with her.
When a Jerk approaches a woman, he makes no bones about what he's after. He flirts with her, lusts after her, and tries to convince her to come home and have sex with him.
The girl knows RIGHT AWAY what the Jerk wants, and after he's made it clear, it is up to her to decide if she wants to give it to him.
If not, the Jerk moves on and finds another girl. If so, then the Jerk takes her by the hand and drags her off.
This type of honesty is actually appreciated by women. In contrast, you have the nice guys who try and fly under the radar by being an asexual "friend." He hangs out, listens to the girl's problems, tries to help her when she needs it, and then all of a sudden, he springs the fact on her that he's deeply in love!
And the girl FREAKS OUT.
The reason for this is that the "nice guy," in trying to not get rejected quickly by misrepresenting his intentions, has basically built a relationship with the girl based on LIES.
And because of that, the girl has already pegged him as a "friend."
So when the guy wants to be ?more than friends,? the girl feels betrayed, because she?s become accustomed to thinking of him in a certain way, and now he?s demanding she look at him differently.
(Not surprisingly, shortly after this happens, most girls even stop being ?friends? with the guy!)
Nice guys should make their intentions clear from the start. Flirt with a girl. Let her know you like her and want to date her! If she rejects you, move on until you find a girl who likes what you have to offer.
That's what the Jerks do, and it works out great for them!
All too often, getting rejected from one girl will send a "nice guy" down a spiral of depression. His self esteem will hit rock bottom, and he'll get depressed and withdraw for the rest of the night.
Jerks don't suffer from this problem. They safeguard their self-esteem viciously, and don't allow rejection to get them down.
This is why Jerks are Jerks! Because they will completely IGNORE rejection, and even go so far as to put down and ridicule other people to make themselves feel more important than they are.
This constant guarding of their self esteem allows them to keep pursuing their goals by not allowing them to fall into a funk of depression.
And no matter how you cut it - a guy with high self esteem is always way more attractive to women than a depressed loser.
For the average nice guy, it's important not to take rejection personally. If a girl isn't into you, it doesn't mean you're not attractive, or cool, or interesting - it just means that girl isn't right for you!
So you keep looking for one that is, and you don't stop until you find her.
Rejection can be a hard thing for anyone to deal with. But remember to keep a positive outlook. Instead of seeing it as "losing a girl," think of it like "I just eliminated a girl who'd have wasted my time if I pursued her."
You don't need to ridicule or bad mouth others to feel good about yourself like Jerks do, but you should protect your self esteem as viciously as possible, because that will keep you going.
Understand - picking up women is a numbers game. The more women you meet, the more likely it is you'll get one! Jerks succeed due to their tenacity and ability to play the numbers. Nice guys go for one or two women a night while Jerks hit up 20-30.
And it's these five traits that allow them to do that!
But if you really want to learn the secrets of building your confidence, safeguarding your self esteem, and approaching women without getting rejected, you should head on over to my website and sign up for my free newsletter.
Every day, I send out advice and tips on how to be more confident and how to approach more women.
So click here to sign up for my free approaching women course.
And remember - you don't have to be a Jerk to attract women! You just have to be the type of guy who isn't afraid to go after what he wants.
Joseph Matthews is an expert in the dating advice field. Since 2004, he has been teaching men how to build their confidence and meet and date more women. He is the author of the best-selling book The Art Of Approaching. You can learn more about Joseph and his teachings by visiting his website at Art of Approaching.
P.S. Just A Guy Thing highly recommends The Art of Approaching. It's one of the few books that will actually help you meet and pick-up women - no b.s.