Being a guy is much more than being obsessed with womens breasts, drinking beer and watching sports. I mean, it is those things, but part of being a manly man is being able to harness our inner manliness to perform functional tasks that no other gender can accomplish (namely, the female of the species!).
There are great number of tasks that manly men can – and should – be able to perform, not only for himself but for his distinctly feminine better other half.
With that in mind, check out the following list of manly things that every guy should be able to do. If you can’t do anything on this list, it’s never too late to learn. God speed my masculine allies!
- Change a car tyre
- Build a camp fire
- Pitch a tent (a proper one fellas, watching porn does NOT count)
- Fire a gun with moderate accuracy
- Down a pint of beer in one gulp
- Sharpen a knife
- Train a dog
- Powerslide a car round a corner
- Paint a room
- Mix concrete
- Cut down a tree
- Fix faulty wiring and light fittings
- Change car oil and filter
- Paddle a canoe
- Set up an XBox on a HDTV
- Steal your neighbours cable and/or WIFI connection
- Read a map WITHOUT using a SatNav
- Throw a mean left/right hook
- Take a mean left/right hook
- Cook a meal that isn’t beans on toast
- Climb a mountain
- Fillet a fish
- Survive a shopping trip with your wife/girlfriend
- Complete an army assault course
- Survive on a desert island (Wilson volleyball is optional)
- Go hiking for the weekend
- Hold your own in a boxing ring
- Survive a bear attack
- Be able to bend it like Beckham
- Fix a leaking pipe
- Host a successful BBQ
- Win a steak eating contest
- Bet (and win) on a horse/dog race
- Beat (at least) one of your friends at arm wrestling
- Hit the bell on the strength contest at the local carnival (you know, the one where you have to swing the hammer)
- Work out to get functional strength – not to look good!
- Put out a fire
- Go fishing with the fellas and actually catch something
- Read a book – anything by Andy McNab is acceptable
- Put up a shelf/bookshelf
- Demonstrate nunchuck skills
- Tie a Windsor knot
- Install hardware/software onto your PC or Mac
- Tarmac a driveway
- Dance while holding a pint of beer (and not spilling the beer)
- Walk home drunk from the pub/club without falling over
- Survive being interrogated
- Act like a gentleman around women
- Win at least one drinking game against your mates
- Drive really fast but never get caught by a camera or radar gun
- Never get lost while driving and NEVER ask for directions
- Listen to your wife/girlfriend while watching the football
- Remember your wife/girlfriends birthday and/or anniversary
- Look at hot women without being caught by your significant other
- Dress well when you need to and slob it up when you don’t
- Keep a covert porn stash where it can never be found (except by you)
- Start a fire using nothing but two sticks and your ingenuity
- Win at least one hand of poker against your friends
- Fix a wobbly table without making the legs 6 inches shorter
- Hussle somebody at a game of pool
- Understand how to play and win on fruit machines
- Make idle conversation with a hot blonde in a bar
- Command a covert team of Special Forces soldiers in a paintball game
- Open a stiff jar lid without blowing a blood vessel
- Flare bottles and glasses like Tom Cruise in Cocktail
- Carry a keg of beer to a party without dropping it
- Pretend to like your wife/girlfriends friends
- Thrash a few geeks on Call of Duty 4 on XBox Live
- Know never to wear socks with sandals. Ever
- Chop logs with an axe for firewood
- Score at least 100 in a game of darts
- Become a Centurion
- Shave like your grandpa
- NEVER forget Valentine’s Day
- Save a child from being hit by a speeding car
If you know of a manly activity that I’ve missed off this list then please let me know in the comments and I’ll add it on. My aim is to get a comprehensive list of strictly male activities for future reference. You can also check out The General Guy Rules by my friend, Archer.
February 5th, 2008 at 12:09 am
76. Make a slam dunk on a basket court.
That’s about it.
Nice list, Christian
February 5th, 2008 at 5:14 am
Nice article. I should have thought of that. Glad to see your site progressing.
Archer.
http://www.boingbook.com
February 5th, 2008 at 4:50 pm
77. Drive a stick shift
78. Shine your shoes
Great list!
February 5th, 2008 at 7:36 pm
79. Iron your clothes (and do it WELL)
Great post, this is as good as the “top 100 movies every guy should watch”. Keep it up!
February 6th, 2008 at 12:45 pm
79. Muster the will power to stop reading this kind of lists after the seventh or so entry
February 6th, 2008 at 8:30 pm
80. Be able to make at least 50 push ups!
81. Score twins!
82. Break a beer bottle in some as*hole`s head (in the bar)!
83. Drink raw eggs like rocky! (just once!)
There are a few more, but I don’t want to her carried away
February 10th, 2008 at 11:15 pm
Thanks for the great additions guys (yes even you dieter!) I love all the great feedback.
February 12th, 2008 at 10:20 pm
You had me then you lost me – started good and then got stupid – why not write a real list instead of just one for ent that reads like a combination of maxim lists -
February 13th, 2008 at 3:29 am
Roll a cigarette. Grill a steak. Order fine wine.
February 15th, 2008 at 10:09 am
1. Change a car tyre— I grew up in my fathers garage
2. Build a camp fire— never did that, does burning my ex gf’s house down count?
3. Pitch a tent (a proper one fellas, watching porn does NOT count)–nope dont know
4. Fire a gun with moderate accuracy– WONT SAY
5. Down a pint of beer in one gulp— OH YEAH
6. Sharpen a knife—YEP
7. Train a dog— THATS EASY, TRAIN A WOMAN TO LOVE INTERNET PORN, THATS BETTER
8. Powerslide a car round a corner—WHATS THAT?
9. Paint a room— UNFORTUNATELY
10. Mix concrete— I COULD DO IT
11. Cut down a tree— NEVER DONEIT, SMOKE TREEES THOUGH
12. Fix faulty wiring and light fittings—DO I HAVE TO?
13. Change car oil and filter—REFER TO NUMBER ONE
14. Paddle a canoe— HELL YEAH , AND I ENJOY IT
15. Set up an XBox on a HDTV— WOULD LOVE TO HAVE ONE SO I CAN
16. Steal your neighbours cable and/or WIFI connection— HOW DO YOU THINK IM HERE RIGHT NOW?
17. Read a map WITHOUT using a SatNav— GOOD AT THAT
18. Throw a mean left/right hook— RFER TO 17
19. Take a mean left/right hook— TOOK MANY
20. Cook a meal that isn?t beans on toast— BEANS AND TOAST ROCK THOUGH
21. Climb a mountain— DIAMOND HEAD HAWAII, BUT IT WAS A WALK/HIKE
22. Fillet a fish— LEAVE THAT FOR MC DONALDS
23. Survive a shopping trip with your wife/girlfriend— I ENJOY IT
24. Complete an army assault course— ON COMOUTER MAYBE
25. Survive on a desert island (Wilson volleyball is optional)— WOULD HAVE NO CHOICE
26. Go hiking for the weekend— SOUND COOL
27. Hold your own in a boxing ring— REFER TO 19
28. Survive a bear attack— DOES RUNNING WITH WHILE ILL POO MY PANTS COUNT?
29. Be able to bend it like Beckham— VICTORIA?
30. Fix a leaking pipe— I CALL THE PLUMBER
31. Host a successful BBQ— DONE IT
32. Win a steak eating contest— MMMMMM
33. Bet (and win) on a horse/dog race—- DONE IT, LOST MORE THOUGH
34. Beat (at least) one of your friends at arm wrestling— OK
35. Hit the bell on the strength contest at the local carnival (you know, the one where you have to swing the hammer)— DONE IT ( FLEXING )
36. Work out to get functional strength – not to look good!— LEARNING THAT NOW
37. Put out a fire— ESPECIALLY IF ITS A YOUNG BRAZILIAN GIRL THATS SMOKING
38. Go fishing with the fellas and actually catch something— A COLD?
March 6th, 2008 at 8:04 pm
Piss up a wall higher than your friends (male and female)
March 9th, 2008 at 10:39 am
Everybody can piss on a wall, but can you shit on the ceiling?
March 16th, 2008 at 10:51 pm
Going through the list just now…..damn where can I find a bear these days.
Nice artice.
April 13th, 2008 at 8:46 pm
lol 15 is a bastard when it comes to xbox live,
trust
as for 28 throwing shit doesnt work btw
August 30th, 2008 at 9:17 am
The free men’s online magazine.
why havent there been any updates to this site in a while?
March 4th, 2009 at 9:42 pm
Super-Duper site! I am loving it!! Will come back again – taking you feeds also, Thanks.
March 30th, 2009 at 12:51 am
bugger off im a female and i can do half those things so naaa
lol but yeah great list except 50,65,72 and 75 is just showin off
October 18th, 2009 at 3:31 am
Be able to weld.
October 25th, 2009 at 2:45 pm
Men don’t make lists you moron. They make tasks, that way, things get done.