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Using science as an excuse to get tanked on booze has always been a dream of ours at the JAGT HQ, which is why writing this article was all the more satisfying. The thesis is simple; get drunk seven times and for each hangover, try a different ‘cure’ and report back on its effectiveness.
Our subject is a 25 year old male who has experienced some decline in his ability to recover quickly from a hangover. Let’s see what Wikipedia says he has to look forward to:
A hangover is associated with a variety of symptoms that may include dehydration, fatigue, headache, nausea, vomiting, diarrhea, weakness, elevated body temperature, hypersalivation, difficulty concentrating, anxiety, irritability, sensitivity to light and noise, erratic motor functions, and trouble sleeping. Many people will also be repulsed by the thought or taste of alcohol during a hangover. The symptoms vary from person to person, and occasion to occasion, usually beginning several hours after drinking.
Looking at the extensive list of hangover symptoms only makes our relationship with beer all the more bittersweet. Let’s get stuck into the experiment and see how our subject got on.
Hangover Cure #1 – The hair of the dog
Image by szczur
The Myth
The colloquial English phrase “the hair of the dog that bit you” actually suggests alcohol itself as a form of treatment for a hangover. Scientifically, there is evidence that a hangover is not only the body removing toxins but also the body’s reaction to withdrawal of alcohol.
The Reality
“After a heavy night drinking, I wake up with a splitting headache and smelling like Robert Downey Jr. before rehab. The thought of drinking more alcohol is unbearable as the nausea sets in. Grudgingly, I crack open a bottle of Budweiser and sit, shaking, in my underwear as I sip the golden nectar in the interests of science. After 30 minutes I start to feel a lot better. Out comes another bottle and this one goes down a lot smoother than before. It’s not even 9am yet and temptation has me craving a third bottle of beer. I resist, and although I feel pretty good now it’s only a matter of time before the familiar symptoms creep back to ruin my day.”
The Conclusion
After trying the hair of the dog, our subject reported that he actually began to feel better. His headache subsided and the feeling of nausea passed. Unfortunately, once he’d finished drinking the symptoms came back just as strongly in the afternoon. By drinking a couple of beers he had merely delayed the inevitable. Now, if he had mixed himself a Bloody Mary, it might have been a different story.
Hangover Cure #2 – A big greasy breakfast
Image by markscott
The Myth
Here in England, ask anyone what the best hangover cure is and it’s very likely that they’ll say, “A big greasy fry up.” A fry up, also known as a Full English Breakfast is a traditionally cooked meal which is served in the morning and will include most of the following:
- Toast or fried bread
- Fried bacon
- Fried egg
- Sausages
- Fried or tinned tomatoes
- Fried mushrooms
- Baked beans
- Hash browns
- HP brown sauce and/or ketchup
While not exactly good for your heart, it is said that a full English can “soak up the alcohol”.
The Reality
“My head feels like I’ve been in a train wreck and to say my stomach is a little delicate would be an understatement. I don’t really feel like eating but the smell of the fried egg and bacon gets me salivating and my taste buds are on red alert. I apply a liberal amount of HP brown sauce to my bacon, sausage, eggs, baked beans, hash browns and tinned tomatoes and get stuck in like I haven’t eaten in weeks! To cap off a fantastic breakfast I wash the food down with a strong cup of tea. Half an hour after the breakfast, my nausea has all but vanished. My head, while still throbbing, doesn’t pound anywhere near as much as it did before I ate and any lethargy I felt when waking up has been replaced by a sudden surge of energy.”
The Conclusion
A pretty good result for this cure. The headache didn’t completely disappear but it subsided, along with nausea and laziness! Perhaps the Full English Breakfast really does soak up alcohol after all?
Hangover Cure #3 – Exercise
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The Myth
There is no denying that a workout makes you feel good. The endorphins are flowing, you clear your mind and your blood pumps through your veins. But is this a good idea after a heavy drinking session? Science states that exercise after a night on the tiles helps the heart pump blood around the body and increases the amount of oxygen in your body too. This, supposedly, flushes the impure toxins of the booze out of your system.
The Reality
“After arriving at the gym, I spend about ten minutes at the water cooler trying not to be sick psyching myself up. With plenty of water to hand, I finally get on and start at a light, steady pace. Surprisingly, my stamina is actually better than usual. I’m sweating like a nun in a cucumber patch but enjoying every second of the workout! After 30 minutes of moderate jogging I decide to call it a day. The walk home is borderline euphoric. If only I’d known that working out after a skinful was this rewarding; I would be built like a Greek god by now. A few hours after the gym however, my head is pounding and I feel exhausted and weak. My euphoric high has now been replaced with a depressive low. So much for the gym being the answer to my alcoholic prayers.”
The Conclusion
Working out seems to be a short term solution to the problem, but is the immense high of working out when you’re already dehydrated worth the physical risks and the manic low experienced by our test subject? Our verdict: no.
Hangover Cure #4 – Drinking water
Image by positivelypurple
The Myth
Although technically a prevention rather than a remedy, drinking water before going to bed is the most common way to prevent a hangover from occurring. The science behind this is simple; excessive drinking leaves your body dehydrated. Replenishing your body by drinking water is the logical way to counteract this. Let’s see if it worked.
The Reality
“After ten pints and a couple of shots, I stumble home in a drunken stupor. I almost head straight for bed before I remember there is something I’m supposed to do. What the hell is it? Oh yes, I need to drink lots and lots of water. I grab my ‘Worlds Greatest Lover’ pint glass and fill it with water. Somehow a pool of water appears on the floor too. Never mind, the girlfriend will sort that out. I refill three times and force the non-alcoholic liquid down my throat. I feel bloated and sleepy. I burp quickly before heading to bed. The next morning I wake up at 9am and lie there for a moment. No nausea, no lethargy, a very slight headache but nothing I can’t handle. ‘It’s a miracle!’ I proclaim as I get out of bed. Oh no….dizziness sets in and I lose my balance and bounce against the wardrobe door. It passes quickly but now the headache is more noticeable. I don’t feel terrible, but I don’t feel great either.”
The Conclusion
There is no questioning that drinking plenty of water both during, and after, your drinking session will be of great benefit the morning after. Our subject suffered slight dizziness and lack of balance, but after ten pints and a few shots, this is actually quite a good result.
April 9th, 2008 at 12:48 pm
I find the best cure to be a Mars bar and slowly sipping a can of Old Jamaican Ginger Ale.
With the headache be careful about what you take, particularly avoid Nurofen and Ibuprofen based cures as they can really upset your stomach when mixed with booze.
April 9th, 2008 at 2:36 pm
The morning after, I like to have a big ole turkey sandwich from Subway. It’s sorta like ‘comfort food.’ And lots and lots of acetaminophen for the head and body aches.
April 9th, 2008 at 3:03 pm
Depending on exactly how bad your hangover is, e.g. if nausea and dizzyness are your biggest worries, and #7 didn’t help (and if your stomach keeps trying to #7 you even though you politely tell it you’re fresh out), then the best solution is benadryl (diphenhydramine).
Diphenhydramine is a good motion sickness cure, and is an anti-emetic–keeps you from #7ing any more, which is why you should get it all out before taking it. Plus, you’ll very likely sleep for a couple more hours while the bulk of the hangover works its way through you.
Best taken with a big-ass bottle of Gatorade.
April 9th, 2008 at 3:16 pm
Usually I take few pills of vitaminium C before sleeping. It reduces the pain at morning. Technically, vit. c is flowing out of organism, while drinkig, so we have to supply it. Also vit c keeps water in organism.
April 9th, 2008 at 3:34 pm
I reckon a pint of water before sleeping and a pint of water and your painkiller of choice by the bed. When you first wake up take the painkiller drink the water and go back to sleep.
Doing this I still have a dodgy stomach but my head is fine. I’m still under 25 though
April 9th, 2008 at 3:37 pm
Drink water. Repeat. Drink water. Repeat.
You get a hangover from being dehydrated. We forget to hydrate because the alchohol, is doing it’s job. It makes you forget to do the stuff your are supposed to doing anyway.
Switch it up while drinking. Or at least start out with a waterback. Hydration always helps.
April 9th, 2008 at 5:57 pm
7up (with a straw) and saltines after making myself hark always makes me feel better. relaxing and deep breaths also calm the body which seems to be help me.
April 9th, 2008 at 6:10 pm
The best hang over cure is smoking weed hands down!!!! It makes your stomach feel a million times better, gets rid of your pounding head, and makes you actually want to eat.
If you have a hang over smoke a blunt. you will be fine
April 9th, 2008 at 6:33 pm
Pain Killers and lots of sleep will do the trick. But I suppose your body doesn’t need any more chemicals in it after all that drinking so SLEEP is the best remedy.
Take a few Exedrin or any other migrane medicine and rest for a couple hours. It should kill the sickness.
April 9th, 2008 at 6:44 pm
best hangover cure is to take B12 (to metabolize all the sugars) and Lecithin (avoids brain damage) both the NIGHT BEFORE. I’ve never had a hangover doing that, no matter what swill I drink
April 9th, 2008 at 7:13 pm
I’ve never tried it but i’ve heard of thing called a prairie oyster that’s basically a little water in a glass with a raw egg a little worshtishire sauce and a drop of tabasco. I’ve heard it works but sounds disgusting to me so i’ve never bothered to try it.
April 9th, 2008 at 7:17 pm
marijuana is by far the best cure. not only does it put your head in a nice place, but it gets rid of the nausea so you can enjoy the english breakfast.
April 9th, 2008 at 7:20 pm
I smoke a lot of weed before I go to bed, then I smoke some when I wake up.
April 9th, 2008 at 7:28 pm
Hangover prevention is key. While there are temporary stop gaps, like the right meal, hair of the dog, or Advil; once a full blown hangover has set in, there is almost nothing you can do to fully remedy it.
The trick is to reinforce your body enough to take the torrent of alcohol. Here’s how you do it:
Several hours before drinking, take either a 1000mg supplement of vitamin C, or even better, an Airborne. The Vitamin C, D, and B12 will keep your liver in shape for processing all the booze to come.
An hour before drinking, eat a big ass meal. Greasy is good, but I prefer foods with loads of carbs over straight grease. Steak dinners work especially well, although pasta dishes are also recommended.
Once you hit the booze, attempt to drink as much water as possible throughout the night. Now the whole 1 for 1 thing is really impossible as any real drinker will be too preoccupied with hammering down shots to have a water intermission, so what I like to do is just keep a large bottle of water with me.
After boozing, if you’re still conscious, drink as much water as possible and EAT AGAIN. Fortunately, all the best drunk foods are also the best for killing the hangover.
Finally, get plenty of rest, wake up without an alarm, and enjoy the day.
April 9th, 2008 at 7:39 pm
Looks like the best remedy is loads of water before going to bed, THEN a big breakfast in the morning (or whenever you manage to wake up).
April 9th, 2008 at 7:44 pm
a tall glass of water at bedtime and 6 hits of lsd upon waking, in 30 minutes your hangover will be a forgotten nightmare…
April 9th, 2008 at 7:50 pm
I find the best hangover remedy to be
1. water night before
2. water first thing in the morning
3. clean bowl pack of fresh marys finest heady greens
4. nap
5. another bowl
6. pizza
Its been working wonders for me for the past 16 years!
April 9th, 2008 at 7:50 pm
my steadfast remedy:
-water before bed (if you remember)
-2 packets of emergen-c in the morning
-another liter of water
-stumble down the street for a burrito (not that laxative they wrap up as taco bell, i’m talking a real mexican burrito. a good cheeseburger will also do in a pinch)
-a beer with the burrito if you feel up to it
-another liter of water
-take a big piss, smoke some weed and pass back out for another hour or two and you’re golden.
April 9th, 2008 at 8:03 pm
Smoke some cannibis, hangover helper I always say!
April 9th, 2008 at 8:12 pm
how is no one going to say a joint? that is the greatest hangover cure.
April 9th, 2008 at 8:17 pm
My method of hangover cure is not so much a quick cure as it is a lifestyle. I have been drinking heavily for the better part of a decade. While I still get a hangover every once in a while, they are very uncommon. I noticed, sometime last summer when my brother and I were discussing hangover cures only to realize, that neither of us have had a real hangover in years. Being brewers, bartenders and beer nerds by trade, I believe, has elevated our bodies ability to evacuate alcohol at a rate unparalleled my most.
April 9th, 2008 at 8:33 pm
Pedialite
April 9th, 2008 at 8:38 pm
Hasn’t anyone here ever heard of marijuana? One toke on a morning following a drinking session is a 100% cure for a hangover, but don’t smoke while you’re all wasted that night, or you’ll get dizzy and puke for sure.
April 9th, 2008 at 9:52 pm
Agreeing with the above posters. I’ve got a bottle of water next to my bed, which is filled when I go out for the night, and empty before I go to sleep. I wake up a few hours later, refill the bottle and empty it again and go back to sleep. The next morning, I’m only slightly tired because of the short night.
April 9th, 2008 at 10:01 pm
I always get some italian food. Its secret is in the sauces they use, based on tomato and other stuff. It creates some kind of a coating in your stomach, reviving your need to eat and reducing your lethargy.
Some traditional pizza restaurants (and not those from fast food stores) do the trick for me
April 9th, 2008 at 10:06 pm
Drink 1 bottle of Gatorade with 1 vitamin-B complex before drinking and repeat before going to bed. You’ll wake up feeling like a million bucks (with maybe a light headache). It’s similar to just drinking water, but it’s giving you more of what your body needs.
I’ve tried just the Gatorade and just the vitamin by themselves, but together they are a god-send. Take it from this former beer bonging, keg standing, Keystone Light shot-gunning frat boy…this remedy never fails.
April 9th, 2008 at 10:23 pm
You missed a big one. Vitamin B12. It’s one the active ingredients in most hang over cures.. the trick is to take at least 4000mg. Works for me
April 9th, 2008 at 10:36 pm
While I do agree that smoking weed is a great cure for a bunch of ailments, unfortunately some us have to take that piss test every now and then so we don’t get fired from our jobs.
That said, water does the trick for me. Or get your weight up and drink more on a regular basis. Bartenders rarely get drunk, and that’s because they already drink a lot.
April 9th, 2008 at 10:48 pm
go for a swim, great for getting rid of even the worst hangover, especially if the water is cold
April 9th, 2008 at 10:52 pm
If you’re in to it, a big joint in the morning is by far the best medicine.
April 9th, 2008 at 11:04 pm
vitamin b12 pills will get rid of a hangover within the hour
April 9th, 2008 at 11:05 pm
nothing beats a valium and a nap. best hangover cure ever.
April 9th, 2008 at 11:27 pm
When your liver processes alchohol it uses sugars in your body, part of the reason you feel a hangover is because of low blood sugar. My personal fav cure is packages of smarties (or some other sugary candy) and lots of water. A good breakfast also helps.
April 9th, 2008 at 11:48 pm
it seems that a having a big greasy breakfast and drinking lots of water would be the most logical cure, seeing as they were both pretty effective
April 9th, 2008 at 11:56 pm
after many scientific tests of my own, i have the two best curse for a hangover:
1) sleep. if you can, get back to sleep. take sleeping pills if needed (not while drinking, i hope this goes without saying.) sleeping through a hangover is the best method i’ve found.
2) if forced to wake up, or unable to get back to sleep, i have one word. kief. beautiful delicious kief.
April 10th, 2008 at 12:34 am
reading this I was itching to write what worked for me as a kid. 1/2 a jar of honey as soon as i got in..worked well BUT after reading comments I agree a joint first thing is the way. dang it works
April 10th, 2008 at 12:41 am
Hey…haven’t seen anyone mention MILK. I don’t know if it’s just me or something in the milk but whenever I’ve been drinking the night before I wake up and chug as much as I can stand. That helps with the nausea and headache. For me.
April 10th, 2008 at 12:45 am
The science of drinking is deeply indebted to your dedication and rigorous study. I laughed myself silly reading this. BTW, next time out, try Gatorade and a couple of multi-vitamins.
Regards,
Richard Best – The Frugal Oenophile
April 10th, 2008 at 1:07 am
The Best thing to do is a combo of the assorted things listed above
1. Water before bed
2. Smoke a little Mary if sick in the morning, like many chemotherapy patients with similar symptoms it alleviates all the headaches and nausea all the while providing slight euphoric feeling and stimulating the appetite.
4. Water in the morning (gatorade is a big bonus, especially if you puked)
3. Big breakfast! Be it greasy or not pig out, the food will give you energy enough to deal with the rest of the day (work).
5. (Bonus) Sauna, sweat lodge, some activity that you will make you sweat. After a real bender when i feeling especially toxic i try to hit the gym and run on a treadmill then shower and sauna, shower and sauna, the results make me feel like a new and sometimes better man. Lord knows I’m not gonna quit drinking. Cheers!
April 10th, 2008 at 3:41 am
Best cure for a hangover: http://besthangovercure.blogspot.com/
You guys almost had it right.
April 10th, 2008 at 9:47 am
Have anyone thought about drinking less, so the hangover never occurs ?
April 10th, 2008 at 10:24 am
the two best hangover cures are coincidentally the only two things you need to survive:
1. water
2. weed
April 10th, 2008 at 7:50 pm
Read carefully, I’m going to reveal an anciet closely guarded secret passed on from scholar to scholar through centuries:
The cure for hangover does not really exist!
Let me interpret this. If you drink much, then there is no cure to save you in the morning. You will inevitably suffer. On the other hand, if you don’t drink much, then you won’t be needing any cure anyway.
For the cure to have any effect, you will have to hit a very, very narrow “band” of consumed alcohol quantity. Most people never hit it in their life time. That “band” is so narrow that you will most likely drink either LESS or MORE than that. Either way, the curing is pointless.
April 10th, 2008 at 9:00 pm
what works best for me :
-good meal before u drink,
-water while drinking,
-B12 is recomended,
-and a good meal and beer in the morning.
April 10th, 2008 at 9:15 pm
How about if someone who spends whole night in heavy drinking and besides that, smokes a couple of packs of cigarettes? Does the same “cure” count for that or do we need another survey?
April 11th, 2008 at 3:56 pm
Well done analysis.
My coauthor and I prefaced the hangover section of our book “The Man Who Scared a Shark to Death (and other true tales of drunken debauchery” with the Robert Benchley quote: “A real hangover is nothing to try out family remedies on. The only cure for a real hangover is death.” I still hold to that.
April 13th, 2008 at 7:43 pm
I found that a glass of irn bru and a spoonful of ice cream mixed together can get rid of pretty much any hangover. It takes a while but it does work.
April 15th, 2008 at 8:37 am
Well the greasy breakfast actually lubes up your intestines so it takes longer for you’re body intake the alcohol and it also prevents you’re intestines from absorbing an extra nasty toxins heavier liquor like rum or whiskey. Most probably would probably get the shits from that.
(could never do this one, my stomach is always torn up)
My cure has never failed me. A couple glasses of water and a vitamin before I go to bed… if you already had a vitamin for that day a B-complex and a C vitamin works to since its water soluble and its hard if not impossible to OD on B vitamins.
April 17th, 2008 at 5:07 pm
Don’t drink?
April 22nd, 2008 at 2:02 pm
I like the big breakfast idea, but it assumes you can keep anything down in the first place. This past weekend, I got trashed. I started puking at around 12:30 AM and dry-heaved every 20 minutes until around 10:30 AM. Not a good night for me. After every session, I would make sure to drink some water, which helped not only to keep me somewhat hydrated during this marathon, but also to give me something to push out. When I finally could go for 1/2 an hour without feeling like blowing chunks, the first thing I did was drink some plain chicken broth, with a little bit of fresh garlic minced in. I felt the blood return to my face quickly after that, so I took some liquid (Children’s formula) Motrin (Ibuprofen) for the headache. By 11:30 AM, I was feeling more or less like normal again. My thought is that it isn’t just dehydration that you’re dealing with when you get a hangover, but that other lost vitamins, and minerals contribute as well. My recommendation is to wait until you can hold water down for at least 15-20 minutes, then try a broth of some kind. If no broth, try a sports drink. From there, you should have smooth sailing.