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Using science as an excuse to get tanked on booze has always been a dream of ours at the JAGT HQ, which is why writing this article was all the more satisfying. The thesis is simple; get drunk seven times and for each hangover, try a different ‘cure’ and report back on its effectiveness.
Our subject is a 25 year old male who has experienced some decline in his ability to recover quickly from a hangover. Let’s see what Wikipedia says he has to look forward to:
A hangover is associated with a variety of symptoms that may include dehydration, fatigue, headache, nausea, vomiting, diarrhea, weakness, elevated body temperature, hypersalivation, difficulty concentrating, anxiety, irritability, sensitivity to light and noise, erratic motor functions, and trouble sleeping. Many people will also be repulsed by the thought or taste of alcohol during a hangover. The symptoms vary from person to person, and occasion to occasion, usually beginning several hours after drinking.
Looking at the extensive list of hangover symptoms only makes our relationship with beer all the more bittersweet. Let’s get stuck into the experiment and see how our subject got on.
Hangover Cure #1 – The hair of the dog
Image by szczur
The Myth
The colloquial English phrase “the hair of the dog that bit you” actually suggests alcohol itself as a form of treatment for a hangover. Scientifically, there is evidence that a hangover is not only the body removing toxins but also the body’s reaction to withdrawal of alcohol.
The Reality
“After a heavy night drinking, I wake up with a splitting headache and smelling like Robert Downey Jr. before rehab. The thought of drinking more alcohol is unbearable as the nausea sets in. Grudgingly, I crack open a bottle of Budweiser and sit, shaking, in my underwear as I sip the golden nectar in the interests of science. After 30 minutes I start to feel a lot better. Out comes another bottle and this one goes down a lot smoother than before. It’s not even 9am yet and temptation has me craving a third bottle of beer. I resist, and although I feel pretty good now it’s only a matter of time before the familiar symptoms creep back to ruin my day.”
The Conclusion
After trying the hair of the dog, our subject reported that he actually began to feel better. His headache subsided and the feeling of nausea passed. Unfortunately, once he’d finished drinking the symptoms came back just as strongly in the afternoon. By drinking a couple of beers he had merely delayed the inevitable. Now, if he had mixed himself a Bloody Mary, it might have been a different story.
Hangover Cure #2 – A big greasy breakfast
Image by markscott
The Myth
Here in England, ask anyone what the best hangover cure is and it’s very likely that they’ll say, “A big greasy fry up.” A fry up, also known as a Full English Breakfast is a traditionally cooked meal which is served in the morning and will include most of the following:
- Toast or fried bread
- Fried bacon
- Fried egg
- Sausages
- Fried or tinned tomatoes
- Fried mushrooms
- Baked beans
- Hash browns
- HP brown sauce and/or ketchup
While not exactly good for your heart, it is said that a full English can “soak up the alcohol”.
The Reality
“My head feels like I’ve been in a train wreck and to say my stomach is a little delicate would be an understatement. I don’t really feel like eating but the smell of the fried egg and bacon gets me salivating and my taste buds are on red alert. I apply a liberal amount of HP brown sauce to my bacon, sausage, eggs, baked beans, hash browns and tinned tomatoes and get stuck in like I haven’t eaten in weeks! To cap off a fantastic breakfast I wash the food down with a strong cup of tea. Half an hour after the breakfast, my nausea has all but vanished. My head, while still throbbing, doesn’t pound anywhere near as much as it did before I ate and any lethargy I felt when waking up has been replaced by a sudden surge of energy.”
The Conclusion
A pretty good result for this cure. The headache didn’t completely disappear but it subsided, along with nausea and laziness! Perhaps the Full English Breakfast really does soak up alcohol after all?
Hangover Cure #3 – Exercise
Image by formationofme
The Myth
There is no denying that a workout makes you feel good. The endorphins are flowing, you clear your mind and your blood pumps through your veins. But is this a good idea after a heavy drinking session? Science states that exercise after a night on the tiles helps the heart pump blood around the body and increases the amount of oxygen in your body too. This, supposedly, flushes the impure toxins of the booze out of your system.
The Reality
“After arriving at the gym, I spend about ten minutes at the water cooler trying not to be sick psyching myself up. With plenty of water to hand, I finally get on and start at a light, steady pace. Surprisingly, my stamina is actually better than usual. I’m sweating like a nun in a cucumber patch but enjoying every second of the workout! After 30 minutes of moderate jogging I decide to call it a day. The walk home is borderline euphoric. If only I’d known that working out after a skinful was this rewarding; I would be built like a Greek god by now. A few hours after the gym however, my head is pounding and I feel exhausted and weak. My euphoric high has now been replaced with a depressive low. So much for the gym being the answer to my alcoholic prayers.”
The Conclusion
Working out seems to be a short term solution to the problem, but is the immense high of working out when you’re already dehydrated worth the physical risks and the manic low experienced by our test subject? Our verdict: no.
Hangover Cure #4 – Drinking water
Image by positivelypurple
The Myth
Although technically a prevention rather than a remedy, drinking water before going to bed is the most common way to prevent a hangover from occurring. The science behind this is simple; excessive drinking leaves your body dehydrated. Replenishing your body by drinking water is the logical way to counteract this. Let’s see if it worked.
The Reality
“After ten pints and a couple of shots, I stumble home in a drunken stupor. I almost head straight for bed before I remember there is something I’m supposed to do. What the hell is it? Oh yes, I need to drink lots and lots of water. I grab my ‘Worlds Greatest Lover’ pint glass and fill it with water. Somehow a pool of water appears on the floor too. Never mind, the girlfriend will sort that out. I refill three times and force the non-alcoholic liquid down my throat. I feel bloated and sleepy. I burp quickly before heading to bed. The next morning I wake up at 9am and lie there for a moment. No nausea, no lethargy, a very slight headache but nothing I can’t handle. ‘It’s a miracle!’ I proclaim as I get out of bed. Oh no….dizziness sets in and I lose my balance and bounce against the wardrobe door. It passes quickly but now the headache is more noticeable. I don’t feel terrible, but I don’t feel great either.”
The Conclusion
There is no questioning that drinking plenty of water both during, and after, your drinking session will be of great benefit the morning after. Our subject suffered slight dizziness and lack of balance, but after ten pints and a few shots, this is actually quite a good result.
April 27th, 2008 at 2:16 pm
Had a horrible hangover this morning
Gonna go try smokin a big ol joint
i dun got a pool or id take a cold swim, theyve worked for me b4
April 29th, 2008 at 4:08 am
Before bed
1. Big Gatorade
2. Multi Vitamin
3. Some IBprofin or tylonel…
When you wake up
4. Repeat the first 3 steps
5. Get a Big Breakfast Pizza
Works like a charm
May 4th, 2008 at 1:51 pm
Well I don’t know if they won’t put it here because I have not seen anyone say it BUT I find the best cure is sex or masterbation.
It gets you sweating so you sweat out the toxins, gets your heart racing and just makes you feel better all around.
May 4th, 2008 at 9:47 pm
Ask any Scotsman what the best hangover cure in the world is and you’ll get “Irn Bru” as the answer. Because it is.
May 14th, 2008 at 2:46 pm
Pedialyte (To help your child rehydrate and feel better quickly, choose Pedialyte? at the first sign of diarrhea and vomiting. http://www.pedialyte.com). Fred Durst even sings about it. I swear by it if it’s that hangover that leaves me crawling out of bed just to make it to the bathroom and then cooler to get the pedialyte.
May 15th, 2008 at 9:20 am
Im mexican, we just eat spicy food (generally tacos with a lot of salsa) at night and/or in the morning, walking out of a bar at 6 am and going to a taco stand is the best thing there is for a) sobering up enough to sleep, and b) not having a hang over the next day. Although “huevos rancheros” are also a pretty good solution in the morning.
May 15th, 2008 at 9:21 am
Im mexican: we just eat spicy food (generally tacos with a lot of salsa) at night and/or in the morning, walking out of a bar at 6 am and going to a taco stand is the best thing there is for a) sobering up enough to sleep, and b) not having a hang over the next day. Although “huevos rancheros” are also a pretty good solution in the morning.
May 29th, 2008 at 5:51 am
Water water water gatorade alka-seltzer and a banana (vitamins and good sugars) this combination has worked for me.
June 16th, 2008 at 1:03 am
I second the Pedialyte (or whatever, any kind of paediatric electrolyte replacement). My mum’s a nurse and she gave me a bunch of them when I was really sick, I didn’t use them all so there are a few hanging around in my fridge still. When I have a killer hangover I drink one of those and some water and go back to sleep.
A heavy breakfast doesn’t work for me usually, I just end up seeing it again. But I have a pretty delicate stomach in the morning even when I’m NOT hung over.
@FilipV: I don’t think that’s 100% true. If I keep myself hydrated while drinking heavily, and drink lots of water before bed and when I wake up… no hangover.
June 21st, 2008 at 9:34 pm
a big bowl of menudo with some lime and onions also drink some carbonated water called topo crico its the best cure even when you cant hold anything down
June 28th, 2008 at 6:04 pm
Cheerz IntelliShot. Best prevention there is. M.D. recommended. They also have tablets.
July 3rd, 2008 at 3:10 am
after a long night i can barely get myself into bed.
so instead of trying to take anything before i end up in bed (which is almost inpossible) i sleep, then wake up in the morning, take some aleve drink a gallon of cranberry juice (to flush out your system) & have a huge greasy breakfast.
works for me.
July 4th, 2008 at 10:28 pm
Yes! I agree with Brendy 100%!!! Weed and some water with Cell Food is the best hangover cure so far…better than the English grease fest
July 10th, 2008 at 12:19 pm
hi.I have been drinking for almost my whole life and to me water workes good but is not the perfect hangover cure.To me a good bottle of gatorade will do the trick.I drink half bfore going to bed and half when i wake up.I feel rerplinished after that.I have tryed all kind of cures and this is the best one i have found.
July 15th, 2008 at 1:38 pm
a big dirty shit does the trick for me
September 21st, 2008 at 9:42 am
Weed, Weed, and more weed, it does the strick every time. Lots of rest. Also drink a laxitive tea, it will flush your sytem out but make sure to dink lots water too. Lots of sex or masterbation works like a charm. A big fat valium works great too=)
September 29th, 2008 at 5:07 pm
replace water with gatorade. replaces carbs, sodium and electrolytes. also, tylenol, and a big breakfast is a great way to wake up. combine those and there will be no signs of a hangover.
October 8th, 2008 at 7:15 pm
Great article! Another thing that works is Zaca Hangover Patch. It’s at http://www.zacalife.com
November 14th, 2008 at 10:32 pm
Weed is the best I’ve found as far as clearing up the effects of the hangover, but it tends to leave me pretty useless and lethargic if I’m blazing in a hung-over state. I drink a few glasses of water before I pass, wake up and let loose the after brew stew, maybe #7, a couple more glasses of water, go to the gym and then eat something and spend most of the day trying to drink water. I don’t usually get headaches and my stomach queez usually goes away after the gym, if not then after I eat. If I’m paralyzed hungover (you probably know the difference between this and the latter) then I’ll most often #7 the morning after, smoke a couple of bowls and either vid or watch movies while drifting in and out of consciousness, repeating over the course of the day. This minimizes the hangover and replaces it with apathy and a feeling like most of the braincells in your head decided to take a nap… not to mention that it helps encourage your appetite.
November 24th, 2008 at 7:47 pm
Why would one even list all those cures…marijuana is the best cure by far, dont waste ur time with that other shit. A whole god damn website on hang over cures and nothing on weed? It works instantly,it feels good theres no better cure.
December 23rd, 2008 at 1:01 pm
glasses of water and orange juice worked for me…
large amount of water and some orange juice led to some puking but headache was gone and i could peacefully sleep for 5-6 hrs more and woke up to being fresh..
January 7th, 2009 at 7:55 pm
Burnt toast, the carbon soaks up the alcohol.
January 21st, 2009 at 3:32 am
Step One: NEVER get Drunk on an empty stomach, not a good idea.
Step Two: Water before sleep. If this causes you to hurl, go for it. The less fermenting poison for your body, to try and process, the better.
Step Three: Water in the morning, THEN milk.
Step Four: This is the important one…..REAL Strawberry Short Cake. NO Frozen Strawberries! NO Canned Whipped Cream! NO Spongy, Empty Caloried, Sugar ridden, Short Cake! Fresh cut strawberries, hand whipped cream and real, homemade, short cake. The strawberries feed your system vitamin c, the cream settles the stomach, and the short cake gives your body something solid to work on. (This is ALSO a great cure for the 5am ‘I’m almost myself again’ acid gloops. *teeheehee*)
Not only does it work beautifully, it’s also a very tasty way to start your ‘Morning After’.
January 21st, 2009 at 3:07 pm
They sell something called THC The Hangover Cure in Texas, it is the only hangover cure I have used that actually works. http://www.the-hangover-cure.com Seriously it kicks ass, everyone at my school uses it.
January 21st, 2009 at 8:07 pm
Actually I tried many many different ones, so far two came up most reliable:
- swim in the lake before heading off to bed. I don’t know if shower will have same effect, for me it usually isn’t.
- take hot tea with lemon & eat some protein, half cooked eggs are awesome. Amino
acids in egg yolks are praise from gods for brain function.
If you can manage large cup of hot tea(english breakfast) with lemon before bed time, you stack odds largely into your own favor.
On other hand drink and have some snacks, while drinking, drink hard liquor, and take stuff, like smoked meats and pickles. That will retain water and keep brean well lubricated.
January 29th, 2009 at 8:50 pm
Take 1 vitamin B12 before you drink and if u remember take at least 2 when you get home and you’ll wake up with NO hang over! I sweAr by this!
February 11th, 2009 at 1:34 pm
1) Keep water beside your bed. Drink as much as you can through the night. When you first start waking up, chug a whole pint glass, and follow it up with an advil.
2) After the advil (or other painkiller without acetametophine), smoke some weed.
3) Refill glass with water and go back to bed for a couple of hours.
The weed will settle your stomach, the water will rehydrate you, and the advil will take the headache and body pains away. When you wake up you’ll be able to down some grease to replenish your system because your nausea will be gone.
I’ve also heard that a banana fruit smoothie works wonders. Soemthing about Potassium and Kerotine.
March 14th, 2009 at 9:46 am
Homemade smoothie with ice, a banana, soy milk, ginger and lots of frozen fruit.
March 15th, 2009 at 3:58 am
To all the people saying weed is a hangover cure – that’s the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever heard! Perhaps getting mashed takes the edge off a hangover but do you really want to go from hungover to stoned? Not sensible. You’ll just have to deal with a vicious, sleepy, hungry comedown later!
My cure for a hangover is basically to continually eat and drink (preferably sugary drinks and McDonalds as you can REALLY eat a lot of that). It’s important that you don’t use paracetamol/acetominophen when you are drunk or hungover as it can poison your liver – kind of hard to explain but basically your liver will be too busy processing the alcohol to deal with the drug properly and this means the drug gets converted into a poison instead, which kills liver cells. And that’s the last thing you need when you’ve had a skin full, really, isn’t it.
So stick to the Ibuprofen… OK, it can be harsh on your stomach but if you take it with food then that won’t be a problem!
March 19th, 2009 at 7:30 pm
Try getting a copy of “the Doctor’s Hangover Handbook” (booklocker.com or amazon.com). It has great, fun science about hangovers. It’s cheap, easy to read and scientifically accurate
May 18th, 2009 at 10:44 pm
Drinking on an empty stomach will always kill you. Me and my co-worker use the party pill from collegepills.com, and follow that up with a lot of water. Always gets my day going and me moving again. Its a lifesaver on those mornings you wake up confused to your alarm clock with blood shot eyes, and you realize that you have to get to work. My co-worker has a bottle in his desk at work. We go through a bottle pretty fast. haha
September 10th, 2009 at 6:51 pm
I have found a product called AfterBuzz that works the best for a hangover! I have been using it faithfully for the best 6 years that recently I decided to sell it too. It’s an electrolyte mixture that you add to water the night of drinking and then the morning after – easy as that. Check out my site at – ILoveAfterBuzz.com
September 11th, 2009 at 12:25 am
I’ve found that the following works for me no matter how much I have had to drink, and I don’t have a hangover the next morning. Only two steps:
1. Have about half a litre to a litre of a really strong cordial drink.
2. Eat 3-4 Vegemite sandwiches, with a load of Vegemite on them. No holding back.
If I do this, when I wake up the next morning, I don’t have a hangover. The problem is trying to remember doing it when you get home drunk.
The cordial contains the sugar to put your sugar levels back to a good level, and of course, the water rehydrates you. The vegemite puts the salt back into your body, whilst filling your alcohol ravaged stomach with food.
October 15th, 2009 at 10:09 pm
I’ve “tried” (more like my ex stuck 4 of them on my back) and i wasnt conscious for 4 hours.
two of the best cures i’ve used are:
-a wake-n-bake followed by a hot pocket
-8-10 hours of sleep and advil liqi-gels
November 14th, 2009 at 11:51 am
Sweating for no reason at all sucks.
November 23rd, 2009 at 11:58 am
Don’t know if anyone else has tried this, but my gf recommended this thing called lifeline hangover defence (she said it was in this months Company magazine here in the UK). I tried it out, and its fantastic! Woke up without a headached and without feeling like crap!
December 30th, 2009 at 8:32 pm
Best cure yet, but most steps MUST be done before passing-out in bed!
1500mg vitamin E.
1500mg vitamin C.
1500mg vitamins Cal/Mag.
1500mg caffeinated aspirin.
Wash down with nominal qty water and a few saltine crackers.
Important: Sleep UNINTERRUPTED as long as possible.
When you do wake: use the toilet; ingest more water and crackers; go back to bed for 4+ more hours. You’ll be back to 95%, and grateful.
January 1st, 2010 at 5:47 pm
After way too many beers last night I had a terrible sinus headache. After having read that the symptoms may be due to histamines, I took benadryl and aspirin. I felt groggy but at least I got rid of the splitting headache which was centered above my right eye.
February 6th, 2010 at 4:44 am
As for herbs and vitamins: take double doses of Milk Thistle (it cleanses and protects the liver) while also drinking lots of water/gatorade. Also, alcohol can cause B vitamin deficiencies, so take a double dose of a B complex vitamin too.
I agree, sex or wanking it helps, as does exercise.
And if you live in England or Canada, take one of those over the counter meds that combine ibuprofen with codeine. That seems to make it all feel well until your body can catch up