EgoTV has a rundown of some killer April Fool's Day pranks. I just like beating people with a sock full of batteries, but I'll be the first to admit that's not very creative. - EgoTV

If you're wondering what macrobiotic means, you're not alone. I've been smiling politely and nodding around my yuppie friends for like five years now. - Made Man

Wiz Khalifa dropped the most-anticipated new album in hip-hop possibly since 50 Cent. - Bro Bible

Here's six knives you must have. For cooking, sicko... - Art of Manliness

Simple drink recipes for stupid people - The Hairpin

Kelly Osbourne looks like a demented Smurf. Well, even more so than normal... - F Listed

Here's a list of the worst athlete cameos in entertainment. It's a pretty long list they had to cull from, no doubt. - Total Pro Sports

Here's a song by MC Keith Masters that was being played all over SXSW. I'm normally not one taken with hip-hop immediately, but this is pretty sick. - Keith Masters

If you vote for GWAR in this contest, they'll have sex with you. Uh, not exactly a selling point, GWAR. Please keep your demon dick in your pants - A.V. Club

And finally, for the dorks...here's how you can find an iPad 2 near you - Gizmodo