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This 73 Year-Old Woman Was Supplying Weed To Four States

Filed under "Fine Living," cause...damn!

Darlene Mayes was just your average 73 year-old grandmother/drug kingpin, until last week, when authorities raided her house in Oklahoma and came across of $200,000 in cash, four pounds of weed, and two pistols. It's really hard to come up with a cover story for having all that stuff. Especially when you're 73. 

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It's theorized that Ms. Mayes was supplying 40% of the weed in her area, which won't be good come trial time, because Oklahoma, along with Arizona, has some of the most draconian marijuana and drug laws in the United States. 

She was found with most of the cash, guns, and drugs in her bedroom, because, honestly, who wants to snoop around some old lady's bedroom? At the very best, it will be boring, and at worst it could be really, really gross. I don't want to get into it, but it totally could. 

Sure, she's a drug dealer who may have been violent or dangerous, but she's still an old lady. How do we know for sure? Because one of the vaccuum-sealed bags was labelled "$15,000," and sure enough, $15k was inside. That's gotta be adorable enough for a sentence reduction, right? Right?

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