Filed Under | Guy Stuff

Are You Man Enough For A Bromance?

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As a by-product of continuing emasculation, the modern man has found himself yearning the company of men. Often for one man in particular. Welcome to the man crush.

In days gone by, men could do things. Things like fixing the car themselves and changing the oil, fishing, owning a shed full of tools and being able to build things from scratch with a few bits of scrap wood, a hammer and some nails. If we needed further proof that our lives have been emasculated we only need to look at the No More Nails product. Now it probably does get the job done just as well as nails, but it’s not manly unless you’re banging nails in at the wrong angle with your hammer.

Modern man is a pale, disheveled shadow of his former self and it’s our distinct lack of a male compass that leads us into man crushes.

What is a man crush?

A man crush isn’t technically a crush in the traditional sexual sense of the word. It’s more like looking to men with certain skills and talents as our leaders. To teach us their ways. Whether it’s the guy with the well paid job, the man who always gets the girls or even the guy with a cool sense of fashion and style.

Often you’ll find yourself making excuses to your girlfriend in a desperate attempt to spend another Saturday night with him rather than her. It boils down to projecting who you can’t be – or things you can’t do – onto other men.

Take The Fonz from Happy Days for example. Richie, Potsie and Ralph all looked up to him. Three total geeks seeking guidance. They wanted to be The Fonz. Let’s face it, who didn’t? He rode motorbikes, was a tough guy and got all the ladies. The fact that he was an unemployed mechanic who lived in a garage and spent most of his time hanging out with teenage boys is irrelevant. The primeval urge to bond with and look up to men manifests itself in their complete devotion to this alpha male.

It’s a simple fact that when not trying to get into some hot girls pants, men will always prefer to hang around with other men.

Do I have a man crush?

Now there are probably men reading this who think that, although they know other men that they like and enjoy spending time with, the terms ‘bromance’ and ‘man crush’ are a little bit of an over-exaggeration. Well, picture this scenario:

You’ve just been asked out on a date by a gorgeous blonde woman when you bump into George Clooney. George invites you to a poker game at his house. The Oceans 11/12/13 guys will be there and no women are allowed. Which would you choose?

It’s an absolute no-brainer. Welcome to the world of man-crushes my emasculated friend.

If you’ve got a man crush on someone, famous or otherwise, and aren’t afraid to admit it then drop us a comment and let us know why you admire this person so.

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7 Comments For This Post

  1. cyber_rigger Says:

    Learn to turn this off. I don’t give a crap about George Clooney. He is an actor not a man who can do manly things. He probably doesn’t even know how to weld. Most celebrities are overpaid losers with a drug problem. Henry Winkler is also an actor.

    The first step is to stop acting like a teenage groupie and learn to do something (WORTHWHILE) by yourself that you haven’t done before. Stuff like playing video games doesn’t count.

    The second step is to not give a crap what others think and do what you want. Let your hair grow out, go full beard, frameless glasses. Screw the fashion police.

    Build a spaceship in your front yard for kids to play on…

  2. Brian Schwartz Says:

    This is a horrible post. Dude, I love your blog, but come on.. man crush? It’s like saying that I am sexually aroused by my friends. I understand that your definition of man crush is not sexual, but then what is the difference between man crush and friendship?

    I look up to my friends in some ways and they look up to me in other ways. But would I ever ditch a girl for my friends? I think the question is better rephrased as “would my friends let me ditch them for a girl”. If they are my friends, then if I didn’t go with the chick I would forever be the guy who has a man crush on my friends. That is not a title I want to have.

  3. Fat Misanthrope Says:

    “It’s an absolute no-brainer. Welcome to the world of man-crushes my emasculated friend.”

    Holy crap. I know no one that would rather play poker with a bunch of nut-less Hollywood posers than go out with a tasty blonde.

    I stumbled into this website. If this is a site for those that would rather be seen with a bunch of Hollywood metrosexuals, then I ain’t a gonna be back.

  4. Silent J Says:

    Man. How can you guys be complaining about an emasculated male society when you are running a contest featuring metrosexual facial care products.

  5. Shaun Says:

    Sorry bro, I’d go for the blond. But I’m a sucker for blonds. Lol.

  6. Itch Says:

    “He probably doesn’t even know how to weld”? Are you serious? He probably doesn’t compete in world’s strongest man competitions either, so he’s clearly not a man. I bet you weld heavy things together and then lift them to prepare for the WSM, then drive your hummer to a brothel.

    I don’t even care about george clooney either, he’s clearly just an example here, substitute your own hero in and read it again. But since when does one need to be employed in a trade like welding to be manly ? Let’s bite on the george clooney bait some more here, as you were avid to do:

    His foundation has given over 9 million dollars to human rights… but you don’t think he can weld so he’s clearly not a man. I guess it’s not as manly as pulling a wounded child out of a burning car teetering on the edge of the grand canyon every day though, like a real man does.

    Here’s a quote from an article about him, at least he’s manly enough to know how to use a screwdriver? can you give him that at least? minor woodworking or carpentry skills are no welding, i admit. article at: http://www.time.com/time/arts/article/0,8599,1714996-1,00.html

    “It’s past midnight; we’re both pretty buzzed. He’s telling me how he wakes up every morning at 5:30 to the hoots of a giant owl and how he climbs into his hot tub so he can hoot back, mesmerized by nature, like Tony Soprano and his ducks, when this alarm starts shrieking. Clooney, not a man of inaction, especially in a moment of crisis like this, stands on my dining-room table, unscrews a panel in the ceiling and, finding nothing, makes me go outside and carry a huge ladder with him up two flights to my garage upstairs—where he climbs into an area I’ve never dared go, crawling along the beams with a screwdriver between his teeth. Finding nothing, he climbs down, knocks the dirt off his jeans, blows the dust out of his nose, rinses his hands and returns to the table. The shriek starts again, and Clooney thinks for a few seconds, ducks down and yanks the carbon monoxide detector out of the outlet. “Either it needs a battery,” he says, “or we have six seconds to live.”

    Bromance is a great word though.

  7. AA Says:

    Every relationship has a sexual component. Guys might not admit to the possibility of a bromance or man-crush but what about its opposite? Have you ever been repelled or disgusted by another guy? I’m sure this is a common scenario yet it has certain similarities to the man-crush. After all why should another guy make your flesh crawl like an ugly old woman might? It’s because that guy has absolutely no sex appeal and your primitive sub-conscious mind is absolutely aware of that and telling you to run away.

    This maybe a mechanism that sorts you into a group. The man yearns to be in the alpha group and so will choose the Clooney poker night over one night with the blonde because it will be a better investment for the future. The Clooney group would undoubtedly offer better future opportunities to see more blondes. Women are the same, joining groups of females that rate similarly in the beauty and style department. Have you ever seen a group of young ladies and noticed how similar they all look?

    I reckon too when that blonde finds out that you gave up a night with Clooney to be with her, she’s going to think sub-consciously, “desperate loser”.

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